Every year around this time I get in my head and spin out a bit. (Full Disclosure I wrote this 8/22/2021) Not necessarily in a good or bad way, just a thoughtful way. I think 42 years and 364 days has taught me that being thoughtful and thinking about who I am, who I wantContinue reading “Late Layer 43”
Author Archives: layersofmentalillness
Layer Twenty Eight…
It is rainy outside. You know what I mean. Where it is on and off annoyingly drizzle rain. There is a promise of the sun to come out midday and then have the perfect afternoon, 67 degrees and sunny. That change in the weather is how my moods change in just one day. My changeContinue reading “Layer Twenty Eight…”
Layer on Layer on Layer
Seven years ago, I found a man that had shot himself in the head in the driver’s seat of an older model SUV. He committed suicide on the top floor of the parking garage where I worked. I found on the cameras that he entered the garage around 4:30am and was not a resident nor didContinue reading “Layer on Layer on Layer”
Layers of History
History repeats itself. That is a true statement. How do we know it is true? Well, look back in history and watch the plagues come and go, watch the wars come and go, watch the protests come and go, watch the fashion trends come and go. Does that statement apply to our everyday life? ToContinue reading “Layers of History”
Layer 822006
It has occurred to me that I have never shared and openly discussed the day I almost died. I have spoken about the day in parts to various people and parts in detail to some of the ones closest to me that experienced the day with me. The utter horror of the day overwhelms now.Continue reading “Layer 822006”
Layer 1,366
It was cold outside. Not bone chilling cold but cold that sneaks up on you and with a snow storm on the horizon hours away the air was filled with anticipation. Anticipation for many reasons though. Spring was around the corner, baseball was just saved and the STL Cardinals were not just keeping 4/7 asContinue reading “Layer 1,366”
Can there be too many layers?
At some point one has to heal, right? When though? At what point? How many years? I mean I’ve worked and worked and worked on bettering myself and learning how to live with my mental illness. But when does the PTSD, the many, many heartaches, all the mistakes I’ve made, when does all of thatContinue reading “Can there be too many layers?”
Layer 43
Every year around this time I get in my head and spin out a bit. Not necessarily in a good or bad way, just a thoughtful way. I think 42 years and 364 days has taught me that being thoughtful and thinking about who I am, who I want to be and what I canContinue reading “Layer 43”
Layer 777 – Gratefulness
On the eve of Thanksgiving 2020 I am alone and feeling as though I need to share what I have learned about gratitude. For me learning things takes a little longer than most. It is hard to stay focused and then when I am riding bi-polar waves up and down my mind is trying toContinue reading “Layer 777 – Gratefulness”
Layer 2020 with depression
Sunday eve is upon me. Things were a little blue this weekend. With Covid ramping up again and I knew it would, it is just feeling pretty isolating like in March and April. I thought I did pretty good through the beginning and now that it is in full force again, I am convinced IContinue reading “Layer 2020 with depression”
Layers 